Changes in the Weather (at GoGirl Academy)

Catherine Lenox blogs for GoGirl about her experience as a student in the Career Acceleration class. You’ll always get her honest and raw opinion of how the course is through her eyes. Enjoy! – Margo Myers, Executive Director

With apprehension already building, I’d allowed over two hours to get from Duvall to Seattle for the first session of GoGirl. At more than middle-aged, ‘girl’ I am not. And, my ‘go’ was down after battling a cold for three weeks.  But, I had made a promise to myself and a friend to be there. So, I gathered myself together and trudged out into the weather.

Torrential rain and flood drenched streets had backed traffic up coming into and leaving Duvall. I realized with dismay that my drive was going to be a long one. To add insult to injury, I had not one, but three large cement trucks in front of me. Laboring up the hill, they were crawling at a rate of under 10 miles an hour — inch, by inch, by inch.

I felt the sweat gathering on my brow as my hands stiffened. “Oh, wouldn’t you know.” I imagined all the other perky, ready students, alert and on time sitting in their seats attentively at the workshop. Instead, here I was lumbering after a parade of cement trucks with time clicking rapidly away, my car barely moving.

After what seemed like an eternity, I finally arrived in Seattle. I thought, “I’ll just sneak into the back of the room and hopefully no one will notice I am ten minutes late.” Guess again. The room could not have been more intimate. Well-appointed participants sat gathered around an oblong table with one empty seat at the left end of the table boasting a large placard that said “Catherine Lenox.”

Catherine is not here, it boomed. Catherine is late, it signaled. Catherine is the only person who did not make it here on time, it chided. Mortified, I slunk into my seat with a weak apology for being late. Everyone smiled at me and, upon my explanation of flooding and traffic, they expressed sympathy.  And, I felt immediately welcomed and forgiven.

It was in this welcoming, safe environment that I had the first significant “ah-hah” moment I’ve experienced since 1989. Yes, I know it’s reasonable to assume that one should have more than one memorable “ah-hah” moment every 20-some years. But, I am a creature of habit and “ah-hah” moments require a lot of mobile mental shifting.

At the time of my earlier “ah-hah,” I was working as part of a think-tank that created achievement tests for California schools.  As a recent English major graduate, I knew my job. I had tutored spelling and grammar and been a student teacher at my college’s writing center. I was trained as a journalist. Writing the language arts section of aptitude tests was well within my comfort zone.  

One morning, however, my senior editor said brightly, “we have a new assignment. We have been asked to create trial tests for gifted children. These will test higher order thinking.” My stomach tensed as I thought, “what in the world is higher order thinking and how on earth will I write tests to measure it?” Tentatively I raised my hand, asking for more explanation. Higher order thinking, she explained, was the process of using deductive reasoning when selecting answers.  If something was so, then logically, what would happen next?

It took seconds for me to realize that this was going to be a big challenge. This job required that I think in a more holistic way and present situations that asked students to extend their thinking beyond a learned answer and, instead, deduce an answer.  The test was multiple choice, which meant that I had to tell situational stories in which the next reasonable step could be deduced – and give that as the right answer choice. Moreover, the stories had to be written in such a way as to test across a variety of disciplines; language arts, science, math, history. In short order, I discovered that I had not been trained to think this way.  Daunted but willing, I plunged into the process.

One day I learned a valuable lesson in perspective. My senior editor and I had both approved a section written about Jules Verne’s book Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea. I’d deftly wrapped questions about vocabulary, spelling, grammar, math, science, and history into the section. It was accepted for the final testing and shipped off with other questions to gifted student schools in California.  These questions were sent to fourth graders. 

On the test’s return, one answer to a question I’d written gave me that memorable “ah-hah” moment. “What would happen next in this story if the ballast was opened on the submarine?” I’d blithely asked, dutifully adding my science question to the mix.  My answer was, of course, “the submarine, being a submersible, would submerge. “

 But, one enterprising young man did not answer the question and put a small note in the margin instead. He wrote simply, “Is the submarine on the surface of the water or sitting on the ocean floor?” I stared at his note with amazement. I had never heard the phrase “thinking outside of the box” at the time, but since have – and, this is exactly what this young man had done.  Of course his “answer” was infinitely more right than mine.  The submarine’s outcome would be very different relative to its placement. He had excelled in higher order thinking! There were two right answers. All one had to do was shift perspective to see it.

This leads me back to GoGirl. After a mere three hours in this workshop, I had the first profound “ah-hah” moment I’ve had since the day I read that test answer and learned the power of perspective. Once again I’m challenged to shift my perspective. GoGirl, in a warm, inviting, encouraging group not unlike a close-knit community, stretches me to “think outside the box” I’ve painted for myself regarding my personality and personal and professional presentation. 

I’ve been unemployed for over a year. I’ve told myself all the reasons. Yes, I know we are in a down economy. Yes, I know jobs are scarce. Yes, I know my field is downsizing. But, these three hours with GoGirl inspires me to “think outside the box” and experiment with a new perspective. GoGirl has already helped me realize that I may be unconsciously standing in my own way and not communicating who I really am, masking my talents and abilities and capacity. 

Once again I’m being challenged to look deep inside, “think outside the box,” and humble myself by posing the question, “Are prospective employers seeing my authenticity? Am I communicating who I really am through my personal presentation? Am I down-playing my abilities or forgetting to champion myself? Am I subconsciously communicating weakness where I really have strengths?”

The answer is the “ah-hah” moment. I know that I need to shift my perspective and realize that there really is more than one answer. It’s time to shift my mind to allow for a new perspective, a new way of seeing, and open myself up to other possibilities.

And, this time, I have a room full of supportive, intelligent, beautiful, talented women and mentors who are assisting me in the process of stretching my mind and celebrating my “ah-hahs.”  Building of self-confidence and identifying who I am, what I want, and getting the guidance, feedback, and tools to move forward into this new unknown is the power of GoGirl. Is the submarine at the bottom of the ocean or on the surface!?  I don’t know, but I am going to let my ballast out and submerge to find out. Or, perhaps scoot along the bottom of the ocean. This much is certain. GoGirl goes where this woman has never gone before. I am truly looking forward to the adventure.

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